Worried? Me? Nah...Oh that, just a nose bleed, no connection.

This is less about my pregnancy and more about bitching for a moment. I know that I should treasure my sleep while I can and that sleeping past seven am is a luxury I will soon not be afforded, however I still don't think that makes it okay for my neighbors across the street to start weed whacking at 6:50 am! WTF. Rude. Not to mention the 8-8 quiet hours in the HOA rules. Inconsiderate! 

In other news I am having some spells of being short of breath and my vision getting fuzzy. I went to my GP for this problem and she sent me for a CT scan of my chest because she was worried that I might have a pulmonary embolism or pneumonia. The scan came out clean, so she felt that the problem was probably more psychological, i.e. panic attacks. I am inclined to agree with her, however, I don't feel like they come on at the right time to be panic attacks. For example I am not dwelling on the unimaginable horrors that could befall my newly forming family, I am not catastrophizing scenarios that leave either Josh or I alone with a newborn to raise on our own...okay so now I might be thinking about those things, but hey, no shortness of breath.

Anyway, you get my drift. So the GP asked me to take Ativan to see if that helped the symptoms. However, after consulting with my pharmacist sister, who informed me that Ativan, along with all anxiety medications, is a Class D pregnancy drug, meaning it has been shown to cause birth defects in humans especially in the first trimester and at high doses. Now while I am out of my first trimester and was not prescribed a high dose, I am still leery of taking it. I discussed this with my GP and she agreed and felt that we should do some blood work to check all of my organ functions and whatnot (ex. cholesterol, liver function, thyroid function, and the like) and if that comes back clean and I am still having "episodes" she wants to do an echo-cardiogram. Whew.

Personally I think this might be getting blown out of proportion due to the fact that I am pregnant. I do have a history of anxiety and I do have a tendency to somatize stress, in other words I push the stress away from my emotions and conscious though and channel it into my physiological being. So I never really feel that stressed out but I end up with odd physical symptoms that are not traceable to anything. Yeah, isn't psychology fun!

I will keep you all posted on how this unfolds, but I am probably just stressing out so no worries. In lighter news, I am no longer able to button my size 10 jeans and really shouldn't be trying to get into them in the first place. It pains me, no literally, it hurts ;)- I am running out of pants to wear. I need my mom to hurry up and get here already so that we can go maternity shopping! Which I refuse to do by myself and will not make my husband go do, not because he wouldn't, but because he is not super fun to shop with and this shopping for over-sized tents needs to be super fun.

Whither Thou Sleepest, Thou Will Not be in Danger of Smothering.

Well, not much happening on the preggo front. We had a doc appointment last week and I heard the heart beat, which was awesome. I got so inspired that I tried to hear it again with my baby doppler at home, but to no avail. I am hoping I just suck at sonar and it's not the device itself.

Still struggling with the clothes thing. I am definitely not fitting into my size 10 jeans at all. Well, I can fit them, but there is no way to zip or button them. I did find a cool pregnancy accessory, it is a Be-Band. It is a stretchy band of fabric that goes over your pants to about your hips and up over the belly, it holds your pre-pregnancy pants up while you are still refusing to buy maternity pants. Works great, plus it fills in the space between your pre-pregnancy shirts that are too short and your pants, making it look like you have a long undershirt on. Lifesaver!

I am into the first week of my second trimester! The nausea has changed from sick for no reason to sick because I am famished and could eat a small village. This is especially bad in the morning after not having eaten all night. I know people keep telling me to leave something to eat on my nightstand, but I just can't bring myself to want to eat during the night or before I get up. I am also getting sick of eating. Enough already! I am so tired of going to the kitchen and having to find something that sounds good and make it. Ugh. Also the semi-constant upset stomach and heartburn are wearing thin. I am hoping that this second trimester kicks into full gear and this ebbs for awhile.

I am trying out a prenatal pilates class this evening. It is at the hospital. I am hoping this will be a place to start building my preggie friends group. I am a little disappointed that most of the pregnancy classes and such are geared for working moms, and start in the evening. I am so tired by that time, but I am determined to get out of the house and meet people and get into shape, so I am biting the bullet on this one.

The kid received it's first gift last week. It is from Grandma Karla and Grandpa Phil. The gift is a co-sleeper that converts into a bassinet and a playpen; or excuse me, a "play yard" because apparently we don't put babies in "pens" anymore. Who decides this stuff? Anyway it is very cool and I can't wait to have a munchkin to throw in it!

Fashion Twilight Zone

Just one question, ladies. Why do the designers of maternity wear think that because you are carrying life, that all of your pants MUST be crops or capris? Who decided that mommy = floods?  I am tempted to go the skirt route to avoid this particular indignity. Another side note, Why did I have to wait to become preggo after the eighties came back in style. GROSS!

So with my twelfth week almost over my belly is starting to pooch out. I find myself rubbing it like it is a Buddha for good luck. The crappy part is that it is just pooching out, no distinct OMG she's pregnant look yet. Just a little fatter. Unless of course I smooth my shirt over my uterus and then you might say that you can see the roundness starting there, but I would just think that you were being nice. My grandmother seems to think that by telling me that my belly is just too big not to be due to the kid will make me feel better about it. But then again her mom used to tell me what a big girl I was. So maybe there is some genetic component there that lacks tact as well as the common courtesy to lie when your granddaughter is obviously distraught over looking fatter but not pregnant. The really weird thing is that I have lost two more pounds, despite what I see in the mirror. I guess that layer of blubber might just be melting away after all.

I did my first prenatal yoga tape! Loved it! But realized that my old yoga clothes look more than a little ridiculous (I ended up taking the shirt off, as it kept sliding up over my stomach). But my wonderful husband immediately told me to go get some maternity yoga gear when I called him to complain. Yeah! Shopping!

My size 10 pants that I was so stoked to buy just a few short weeks ago (actually the day before I found out I was pregnant) are torture devices now. Luckily I have some fat pants in my closet and will be able to use those for another month or so.

One last note, Mother's Day cards. When did they become so poignant?